“On June 12, 1967, the landmark decision in Loving v. Virginia legalized interracial marriage across the country” (Patria, 2007, para. 5). Even after more than four decades have passed since the ban on interracial marriage had been lifted, there is a disparity between adolescent views versus parent/older adult views on this topic (specifically if their adolescent were to date interracially). In a nation that is considered a “melting pot” of various ethnicities and cultures in which there is an increasingly heterogeneous mixture of people; older adults (especially parents) are still reluctant to accept their teen dating someone of another race.
As American adolescents interact with other teens in culturally-mixed settings – neighborhoods, schools, extracurricular activities, churches, and employment - there is a much greater probability (than prior decades) that they will befriend, date, and marry someone outside of their ethnicity. Dating outside one’s own race (especially for children of immigrants) can be a source of cultural conflict (Santrock, 2012, p. 320). This essay will examine the sociocultural factors and beliefs that contribute to the gap between adolescents’ permissive views on dating interracially as opposed to parents’ restrictive demands (or wishes) that they date and eventually marry someone of the same race.
Origin of Issue
As aforementioned, in America’s checkered and jaded past, interracial dating and marriage was viewed as a “black and white” issue: basically if someone were to date and marry someone outside their own race it would go against the grain of social and/or legal prohibitions. In modern days, even though interracial marriage is no longer outlawed, parents that are U.S. citizens as well as immigrants still are uncomfortable, question, or straight-out prohibit their adolescent son or daughter dating outside their own race.
“…when an immigrant adolescent wants to date outside his or her ethnic group, dating can be a source of cultural conflict for families who come from cultures in which dating begins at a late age, little freedom in dating is allowed, dates are chaperoned, and adolescent girls’ dating is especially restricted” (Santrock, 2012, p. 320)
In Dr. Root’s (clinical psychologist) book titled “Love’s Revolution: Interracial Marriage” (2001) she performed research and interviewed 200 people from various cultures and ethnicities. The interviewees discussed their perspectives and experiences and they affirm that prejudicial viewpoints towards interracial dating are slowly deteriorating; however, they also describe the pain of rejection that kin, peers, and judgmental strangers caused.
Also, adolescents and young adults generally have embraced and have been more positive towards interracial relationships than people that were “older” (Wellner, 2005, p. 8). The author of this report asked her Facebook friends (age range: 30 to 45 years old) how they felt if their son or daughter were to date interracially and these are some of the positive responses:
“My 18 year old daughter is dating a great kid who is black. To me black and white are not different races, we're all part of the human race. Color is just a color. Where I see more issues are of cultural incompatibility which transcends color. One could make broad generalizations about cultural ties to color but there are absolutely exceptions in every area. Love is love. If he's good to my daughter, I don't care what color he is” (Trevor Dierdorf, 2012, Facebook status comment)
“My son's first girlfriend was Black. (He's white). I had a hard time with the fact that they were so young, but not the race factor. She was a very nice girl from church. (And still is.) Although I was surprised because all his crushes in the past have been on little pale blonde gals. White is the minority where we live. It's mostly Asian (most of them Phillipino) and Hispanic. If I wanted him to only date white girls I'd have to move! :)” (Tonya West, 2012, Facebook status comment)
Anderson Cooper interviewed three sets of parents of interracially-dating adolescents: an African-American boy who dates Caucasian girls only, a Caucasian boy who is interested in dating black girls, and an African-American girl who has dated Caucasian boys (Cooper, 2012). In each interview, the parents stated that they desired that their children befriend other adolescents of different races, but have different issues with their own teen dating outside their own race.
The African-American boy’s father stated that he became concerned that his son only dates “white” girls and wanted to be sure that his son did not find anything displeasing about “black” girls. The African-American boy said that he doesn’t really know why he has an affinity or attraction towards Caucasian girls, it’s just that they gravitate towards him and vice versa out of friendship.
The Caucasian boy stated that his parents would be concerned about him dating outside his race with a “black” girl because the implication is that since their families would intertwine eventually and the African-American girl’s family of origin is unknown, that would be a cause of consternation.
Lastly, the African-American girl stated that her mother would not have an issue with her dating Caucasian boys; however, if her brother were to date a “white” girl, then there would be a double-standard which would cause a rift simply because the mother would feel that a “black girl” is not “good enough” for her African-American son. The mother actually jests, as an example, the “silky, straight hair” that “white girls” have can be achieved, through straightening, to resemble a “white girl”.
Cooper’s study highlights some of the concerns and issues that parents have with their teen dating outside of their ethnicity. “Black females may also hold strong objections to black male-white female relationships. Black females often view these relationships as rejections of the black community and the beauty of black women” (Kreager, 2008, p. 887). This is the probable cause of the African-American boy’s mother prohibiting her son dating Caucasian girls.
Also, the Caucasian boy’s parents concern that any potential African-American girl’s family may not mesh with theirs because their culture is basically unknown is a common issue for families on both sides of the racial coin. The potential in-law parents are concerned that their adolescent’s mate’s family will not share the same values, traditions, culture, etc.
Bob Jones’ University (Christian university) lifted a ban against interracial dating in 2000 due to their former unbiblical perception that interracial dating was unbiblical (“Bob Jones University Ends Ban on Interracial Dating”, 2000).
There are still some misinformed Christian parents who prohibit their adolescent from dating interracially due to misinterpretation of various scriptures that discuss God’s commandment for the Israelites not to miscegenate or intermarry with (idolatrous) people. Some people actually quote the Bible as a justification for not dating or marrying interracially.
One racist website actually summarizes some “white Christian” views on interracial dating (that are still held by a dwindling percentage of people and, unfortunately, a view that many “white Christian” Americans held prior to the 70’s):
“The Apostle Paul: Acts 17:24-28 says that God made man "and hath determined the bounds of their habitation." Genesis 28:1, says that the Canaanites (blacks) were the "servants of servants" and Isaac called Jacob and said unto him, "Thou shalt not take a wife of the daughters of Canaan." (Interracial Dating, Interracial Marriage, Right or Wrong?, nd)
Some misinformed people actually believe that Adam and Eve and the “chosen” people were completely, 100% “white” and that the Canaanites were “blacks” (which have no biblical basis whatsoever). Thankfully, the majority of parents do not ascribe to these beliefs (aforementioned) but there still lingers a racial bias against their teen dating interracially.
Also, adolescents whose parents disapprove of their interracial dating will most likely “sneak date” (Santrock, 2012, p. 320). In research conducted by Wang, Kao and Joyner (2004, p. 435), adolescents more than likely will not introduce their significant other (of another ethnicity) to their parents for fear of disapproval. Therefore, interracial relationships among adolescents are less likely to be supported by parents.
Also, minorities are increasingly gaining a similar socioeconomic status as Caucasians due to increased education of minority U.S. citizens and educated immigrants with degrees. There is a higher probability that minority adolescents will have greater interaction with Caucasian teens in a similar socioeconomic community. Just a few decades ago, mainly Caucasians occupied higher socioeconomic status and now there is more equal opportunity and greater interaction (Wang and Kao, 2007, p. 146). The writer of this essay actually went to a high-school with 99% Caucasian adolescents in an affluent community due to her father earning a degree in architecture from Thailand. Thankfully, she did not have much stigma from parents or peers in interracial relationships due to the mostly homogenous (Caucasian) culture. If her father wanted her to date intraracially they would have had to move to another city altogether!
Statistics and Facts
The majority of young adults approve of interracial marriage between African-American and Caucasian couples: “According to a 2002 Gallup survey of 1,360 U.S. adults, 86 percent of people ages 18 to 29 approved of marriage between blacks and whites, but just 30 percent of those ages 65 and older approved of such marriages” (Wellner, 2005, para. 8). The explanation for the ideological chasm between young and older adults could possibly be explained by the aforementioned prejudice towards people of other races (held by Caucasians) prior to the lifting of the ban on interracial marriage.
“A 1997 Gallup national survey of people ages 13 to 19—found that nearly two-thirds (64 percent) of black, Hispanic, or Asian teens who had ever dated and who attended schools with students of more than one race said they had dated someone who was white. (This poll is the latest comprehensive survey of U.S. teens on the topic of interracial dating.)” (Wellner, 2005, para. 9)
The majority of teens had dated outside their race in 1997. Since this research was conducted 15 years ago, my hypothesis is that this percentage of teen interracial daters would be much higher in 2012 since the attitudes towards interracial dating have become even more accepting.
“Teens surveyed also had an overwhelmingly positive view of interracial dating. For instance, 72 percent of teens surveyed thought people dated people of other races because they cared about the other person, while less than 20 percent thought their peers interdated as a rebellion against parents or as an attempt to "be cool." Nearly two-thirds (63 percent) of white students who had not dated interracially said they would consider dating someone who was not white, while 58 percent of black students would consider dating a nonblack” (Wellner, 2005, para. 10)
Perhaps the slight disparity between the views of Caucasian and African-American students dating outside their race (Caucasians being slightly more open than African-Americans) is that there might be a heavier stigma for an African-American to date interracially due to parental influence (not wanting to offend one’s own African-American parents to cause them to think that “black” girls or “black” boys are not good enough for their preference).
Possible Solutions
As a response to parents who are concerned that their teen partner’s family culture, traditions, and values may not mesh with their own, the suggestion is to connect with that family by inviting them over to dinner or at a social event to get familiar with them. A girl or boy from an African-American family has as much probability as someone from a Caucasian family of having similar values as one’s own family. Embrace the unknown to make it known.
As far as being concerned that a person of the teen’s own ethnicity is viewed as inferior or not “good enough” for one’s son or daughter, more than likely the teen just happens to connect with members of another particular ethnicity and is not spurning or rejecting members of one’s own culture.
Yancy’s book “Just Don't Marry One: Interracial Dating, Marriage, and Parenting” (2003), is an anthology of various essays of differing perspectives on interracial dating. The commonality between all of the interviewees is that it is rooted from a biblical viewpoint. The book highlights interracial couples and marriages in the Bible as well as historical and personal accounts.
The most enlightening person in the book is Ken Ham, biologist, founder of the Creation Museum who scientifically proves and discusses that everyone is related to Adam and Eve (Ham, 2000, “Where Did The Races Come From?”). This is in stark contrast to the racist philosophy of evolution, which states that the Aborigines (Australoid) Africans (Negroid) and the Asians (Mongoloid) are less evolved than their whiter counterparts (Rushton, n.d., “Race in Today’s World”). In fact, scientists now admit that there is little genetic variation between the “races”.
???
“However, all human beings in the world today are classified as Homo sapiens sapiens. Scientists today admit that, biologically, there really is only one race of humans. For instance, a scientist at the Advancement of Science Convention in Atlanta stated, “Race is a social construct derived mainly from perceptions conditioned by events of recorded history, and it has no basic biological reality” (Hotz, 1997, p. A3)
Teachers and counselors (as well as pastors) should create an atmosphere of racial tolerance through a curriculum (in DVD and workbook format) and then offer it to schools nationwide. That way, they are better equipped to handle situations when an interracial couple is being hassled or bullied by peers (or have the disapproval of parents).
Perhaps integrating an elective course (starting in junior high) about racial tolerance and a subsection about interracial dating (perhaps excerpts from the aforementioned book) would be appropriate. Also, to prevent parental ire at this course being offered starting at junior high level, a parental authorization form could be signed. During the course, the main teacher could speak about racial tolerance while showing Powerpoint slides and videos (maybe even movies?) as well as inviting various speakers to give the adolescents a diversified perspective. A question and answer session would also be beneficial as well.
Since stress resulting from family and peer conflict affects a student’s academic and socioemotional functioning, teachers and counselors should be aware when racial bias does occur towards teens because of their interracial relationships.
Christian Worldview
People, as aforementioned, will try to twist scriptures to imply that people shouldn’t date or marry anyone outside their race. One scripture, taken out of context to justify banning interracial marriage, is Deuteronomy 7:3: “Do not intermarry with them. Do not give your daughters to their sons or take their daughters for your sons”. It was a commandment from God to the Hebrews in the Old Testament so that they are not swayed to worshipping the gods of the people that inhabited the surrounding nations. It was not a prohibition against intermarrying based on race, but due to religion because God wanted the Hebrews to have a devoted, committed and worshipful heart towards Him. God also knew the practices of the various people around the Hebrews were sinful (such as worshipping their gods as temple prostitutes in Exodus 34:16 and sacrificing babies to their god – Moloch - in Leviticus 18:21) and did not want those practices to rub off on them.
There were instances of Hebrews that intermarried with people of a different race who converted to Judaism such as Rahab, the Canaanite (Joshua 2) and Ruth, the Moabitess (Book of Ruth) as well as Joseph (who married Asenath, an Egyptian woman, Genesis 41:45-50; 46:20) and Solomon married a black woman (Song of Songs 1:5). Also Jews and Gentiles intermarried and their offspring was the Samaritans and Jesus praised a Samaritan in the parable of the “Good Samaritan” (Luke 10:25-37).
Some people also use 2 Corinthians 6:14 to also imply that people should not interracially marry: “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” This scripture is clearly not referring to light-skinned (“white”) people to not intermarry with darker-skinned people but the condition of the believer’s regenerated spirit (“light”) with an unbeliever’s unregenerate one (“darkness”).
As to the biblical so-called “sanction” for slavery and treating the African race as subservient or inferior (or not worthy of intermarriage) because Noah cursed Canaan: the Canaanites were not “black”. The Cushites were “black” and not part of Noah’s curse. “Cushites were black; Canaanites were not black. Canaanites were cursed while the black skinned Cushites were not cursed. Therefore black skin is not related to the biblical curse. Again: Cushites were black. They were not included in the Noahic curse” (Miller, 1992). Also, the Canaanite curse was already fulfilled when Canaan “was occupied by both Semites (Israel) and Japethites (ancient Philistines).”
Conclusion
Modern adolescents and every successive generation, historically, has and will continue to progress upwards towards cultural acceptance. The dream of Martin Luther King is gradually coming true, that one day his four little children will “one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character” (Mounts, 1995). Due to the “melting pot” of America, more adolescents than ever are coalescing and interacting at public institutions (such as school, church, work, etc.) and, as a natural result of this melding process, are interracially dating and marrying.
Even though there are a lower percentage of parents and adolescents that are against interracial dating and marriage in their own lives as well as influence the lives of others, the majority of people are racially tolerant. Some parents, as aforementioned, have issues regarding their adolescent dating interracially because they are concerned that members of their own are not considered sufficient for their adolescent’s dating preference or up to par physically, mentally, financially, etc. compared to the racially different object of their affection. They also may be concerned that the family of origin of the racially different partner may be too unfamiliar or at odds with their own family culture. Finally, some parents use the Bible as justification to prohibit interracial marriage.
We are, thankfully, equal in the eyes of God who created all of us and views us as precious and valuable. We all are descended from one common ancestry (Adam and Eve) and racial heritage should not be a significant factor in the selection of a mate as much as the content of their character. Just as the Lord made diverse and multitudinous animals, plants, etc. the Lord has also created the beauty of physical, emotional, and cultural diversity in one human family.
References
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Cooper, A. (2012, April 5). Parents Confront Interracial Dating Views. Anderson Cooper 360. Retrieved August 17, 2012, from http://www.ac360.blogs.cnn.com/2012/04/05/parents-confront-interracial-dating-views/?hpt=ac_bn2
Ham, K. (2000). Where Did The Human Races Come From?. Christiananswers.net. Retrieved August 18, 2012, from http://www.christiananswers.net/q-aig/race-definition.html
Hotz, R. L. (1997, February 20). Race Has No Basis In Biology. Cincinatti Inquirer (Cincinatti), p. A3.
Interracial Dating, Interracial Marriage, Right or Wrong?. (n.d.). The Truth At Last. Retrieved August 17, 2012, from http://www.stormfront.org/truth_at_last/archives/interracial.htm
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